Just because I’m non-verbal, it doesn’t mean I can’t speak to you

As glasses clinked around the room, I stood up to deliver my toast.

It was my Uncle Rick’s wedding, and no special occasion is complete without my cheeky sense of humour.

Glancing down at my Microsoft Tablet, I took centre stage next to my dad, Nick, the joint best man. I clicked to access my voice communication software, and with a touch of a button, I was away!

I recognise that the way I communicate takes some getting used to. I can’t talk and from the age of seven, I’ve used software to speak for me – like Professor Stephen Hawking, or the stand-up comedian Lost Voice Guy from Britain’s Got Talent.  

I currently use a standard Microsoft Surface Go tablet, which I wear around my neck. It runs Windows 11, alongside my amazing communication software called Mind Express 5.  

By using this software, I can access a big communication grid of symbols, actions, places, and words. I can choose from my vocabulary of around 12,000 words, across about 200 screens, to dictate my wants, needs and join in conversations.

The speech sounds quite electronic, but you soon get used to it. There are different voices available. Lost Voice Guy, as he comes from Newcastle, has just had a native Geordie voice developed for his tablet.

The software has a slick interface with hundreds of ‘page sets’ available to browse. These ‘pages’ offer different talking points and phrases, and I can pre-program things, like wedding speeches.

Like anyone writing a wedding speech, I started from a blank screen, thinking of appropriate things to say about the bride, and inappropriate stories about the groom.

We then programed a paragraph on each button, and my speech was done. I just had to remember to press the buttons in the right order!

I can also use the search-bar, and type free-form words and sentences using the keyboard. This is more time-consuming, but there’s rarely an occasion when I’m lost for words! I am told that the number of pages and extent of the vocabulary is almost limitless. 

I was a very premature baby, and it took me longer than other children to reach my milestones. That’s when I was diagnosed with a condition called global development delay and my parents realised that I might never be able to talk.

I also have a learning disability, which means that I might need a bit more support to learn new things.  

Without my tablet and Mind Express 5, my life would be very insular.

I went to a mainstream primary school until I was eight years old, and I had to rely on ‘speech cards’ and point to pictures to communicate.

Other children were always very kind and accepting, but my parents have told me that some adults were quite wary of me. They didn’t know how to interact with me, or what my level of understanding was.

Apparently, people would give me looks in places like the supermarket and that’s the hardest thing about not speaking, even now – there’s a tendency from others to treat me like a child or to try to talk for me. I find this rude and it makes me frustrated and angry.

Having a learning disability and being non-verbal has never stopped me from achieving my dreams, whether that’s running marathons, giving best man’s speeches, or doing radio interviews. 

That’s why I feel so lucky that technology came into my life. I remember when I got my first VOCA (Voice Output Communication Aid) machine in 2005, it was so heavy and bulky; like wearing a brick hanging around my neck! These days it works on a normal tablet. 

In the past, if there was a problem with my tech, we’d have to send it away to be fixed via overnight courier. Can you imagine what that’s like, being without your voice for even a day? 

Luckily, all my devices are provided and funded by the NHS and over the years, they’ve become slimmer and slicker. These days, everything can be backed up into the cloud and if something goes wrong, my software can be downloaded onto another Windows-compatible device. 

I know that without this technology, I wouldn’t have as much freedom or independence. I’d still be relying on pointing in symbol and picture books and it would be harder to do the things I love.

I’m hopeful that with advances in technology, there’ll be even more options for me in future. I’d love it if, one day, there was a tablet sophisticated enough to say what I was thinking rather than me having to type and push buttons. 

It’s hard to be treated differently because I’m non-verbal – it’s just not necessary! I’m great at making friends and I have good and bad days like anyone else. My friends and family are very good at recognising what I’m thinking and feeling, even without my tech. 

Happily, because of this software, people no longer assume that I can’t do something or join in. I just hope that when I meet new people, they will persevere – please be kind, patient and give me more time to reply.

I want to keep challenging myself by running more marathons, delivering speeches, and showing the world my cheeky personality.

My tablet is a part of me, and if anyone wants a hilarious best man’s speech, please contact my agent!

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